What Does CPTSD Feel Like?
What Does CPTSD Feel Like?
CPTSD, or Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, is more than a clinical term—it’s something you live with and experience daily. Unlike PTSD, which often stems from a single traumatic event, CPTSD comes from prolonged exposure to trauma, such as childhood abuse, neglect, or abusive relationships.
Understanding what CPTSD feels like is essential—not just for you, but for those in your life who want to support you. This post dives into the emotional, physical, and cognitive struggles you may face with CPTSD, exploring how they manifest and what they stem from.
Emotional Symptoms: The Weight You Can’t Shake
Chronic Fear, Sadness, or Anger
Living with CPTSD can mean dealing with persistent fear, sadness, or anger that feels overwhelming or unrelated to what’s happening around you. These emotions are often rooted in a heightened stress response system. When exposed to prolonged trauma, your brain can become wired to expect danger, leaving you in a constant state of emotional arousal. Your past experiences might also shape how you perceive and react to the world, even in safe situations.
Difficulty Feeling Joy or Connection
Prolonged trauma can disrupt your ability to regulate emotions and form secure attachments. Your brain might have learned to suppress positive emotions as a protective mechanism, making it hard to fully engage with or trust joyful experiences.
So even in moments that should bring you happiness—like celebrating a milestone or spending time with loved ones—joy might feel out of reach. You might feel disconnected, isolated, or alienated, even when surrounded by people who care about you.
Physical Symptoms: When Trauma Manifests in the Body
Fatigue and Chronic Pain
CPTSD doesn’t just affect your mind—it impacts your body, too. Fatigue and chronic pain are common, even when there’s no clear medical cause. These symptoms arise from years of heightened stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, which can lead to inflammation, muscle tension, and physical exhaustion.
Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn Responses
At the core of the survival reactions are the fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses. Each of these mechanisms represents the brain's attempt to protect you from perceived harm, based on past traumatic experiences. These survival mechanisms can kick in even during non-threatening everyday situations. The four main responses are:
Fight: This manifests as an aggressive or confrontational reaction, such as snapping at a loved one or lashing out in anger, even when the situation does not call for it. The body is flooded with adrenaline, preparing for a physical threat.
Flight: Avoiding situations or withdrawing completely can be a way your brain helps you escape what it perceives as danger, a habit formed when avoidance was once the safest option.
Freeze: Feeling paralyzed, emotionally or physically, is your body’s way of shutting down in response to overwhelming situations where taking action once felt impossible or unsafe.
Fawn: Over-apologizing or people-pleasing often develops as a survival strategy in environments where keeping the peace or pleasing others was essential for safety.
Cognitive Symptoms: The Mental Struggles of CPTSD
Negative Self-Perception
Do you hear an inner critic telling you that you’re worthless or a failure? This cycle of self-doubt is deeply tied to repeated emotional abuse or neglect. Over time, these external messages become internalized, shaping how you see yourself and making it hard to break free from negative thought patterns.
Difficulty Concentrating or Making Decisions
Even simple decisions might feel overwhelming, like navigating a mental maze. Prolonged trauma can alter the brain’s prefrontal cortex, which controls focus, planning, and decision-making. Stress hormones further interfere with memory and cognitive clarity, creating a fog that makes daily tasks more difficult.
Interpersonal Struggles: Navigating Relationships
Challenges with Trust
Do you struggle to trust others, even when they’ve done nothing wrong? Repeated betrayals or abandonment during traumatic experiences can make relationships feel inherently unsafe. This hypervigilance, designed to protect you from harm, can create barriers even in trustworthy situations.
Fear of Intimacy
Even in close relationships, you may feel emotional walls going up. Vulnerability, which is key to intimacy, can feel dangerous if opening up in the past led to harm or rejection. To protect yourself, you might keep others at a distance, even when you crave connection.
Finding Support: You’re Not Alone
Living with CPTSD is undeniably difficult, but help is available. Here are some steps you can take to start feeling more in control:
Educate Yourself: Learning about CPTSD can help you make sense of what you’re going through.
Practice Grounding Techniques: Simple practices like deep breathing, mindfulness, or grounding exercises can help you manage overwhelming emotions.
Consider Coaching: Coaching can provide tools and strategies tailored to your unique needs, and help bridge the gap between understanding your struggles and taking actionable steps to regain control.
Ready to Take the Next Step?
Understanding what CPTSD feels like is the first step toward healing. If this description feels familiar to you, contact me to explore personalized coaching sessions designed for your unique needs. You don’t have to go through this alone—let’s work together to create a path forward.
